


This is me. Whoops

by dip_and_pip_trash



Series: Phan One Shots [14]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: 2012, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fighting, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, the video that shall not be named
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-05
Updated: 2018-10-05
Packaged: 2019-07-25 18:14:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16202936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dip_and_pip_trash/pseuds/dip_and_pip_trash
Summary: Wrote as a url fic on Tumblr





	This is me. Whoops

**Author's Note:**

> Wrote as a url fic on Tumblr

Phil paced his bedroom with a sigh. He hated this. He hated what had become of him and Dan. He hated that their once happy and loving lives had become nothing more than hostile and cold. He missed the warm hugs and the kisses. He missed them just talking to come another. That had been the hardest part. Now a simply hello was hard to get past Dan without getting shouted at.

 

All because of a video. A video that Phil regretted ever making. A video that was now out in the open for all to see. And they were seeing it all. And now they had gone from Dan and Phil to Dan. And. Phil.

 

Phil longed for Dan's love to return. He knew deep down that Dan was just mad at what had happened with the video. Surely he still loved him right?

 

The next morning Phil was tired. He had spent the night doing everything he could to try and lull himself to sleep but nothing seemed to be working. Once the sun started shining, Phil gave up on the sleep and went to the kitchen to grab some cereal for breakfast. Normally it would be Dan's that he would steal but not today. Not for over a week, since that video accidentally got released to the world. Phil didn't want to do anything to make Dan hate him even more.

 

He grabbed his own cereal only to see that there wasn't much left inside the box. His own fault really. He shouldn't have eaten so much the night before. Everything felt like his fault lately.

 

_ "Why did you leave it on Youtube. Why didn't you just delete it once I'd seen it. Why aren't you doing anything about the fan?" _

 

Dan's words echoed around his head. He had decided to take a quieter approach towards everything. Dan had made things very public. It was a joke, they weren't together and they were just friends.

 

Except they were together. Or at least they used to be. Phil wasn't even sure if they were still together or not. Judging by the fact that they hadn't really spoken in a week. Just really shouting at one another.

 

Phil froze as he heard Dan walk into the kitchen as well. He didn't dare look up. Dan's moods were always hard to judge, especially in the morning. Phil just stood making his coffee as Dan started to make some food for himself as well. Using his usual cereal and milk before leaving the kitchen. Moment later Phil heard Dan's bedroom door slam shut.

 

_ Dan's bedroom. _

 

It used to be theirs. Their space, their things, their life in that one room. Many nights spent cuddling as well as other things....

 

Phil hadn't slept there in a week. He missed the black and white sheets. He missed hearing Dan's breath slowly when he woke up before him and would spend hours just running his hand through Dan's hair.

 

"Are you going to stand their all day staring at your coffee?" Dan's voice broke Phil from his thoughts. He was back in the kitchen and his face was hard to read. "What's up with you this morning? You're acting weird."

 

Phil shrugged and looked up at Dan. His brown eyes stared into his soul. Phil loved his eyes. "Sorry," He mumbled before grabbing his coffee and dry cereal and starting to walk out the kitchen. An arm blocked his exit however. Blue eyes stared into brown. They were too close. Phil couldn't bare it. He could feel Dan's breath on his.

 

And then they were kissing as if nothing had ever happened. Somehow Phil managed to put his drink and breakfast and just kissed Dan back. Maybe they were going back to normal. Maybe this whole thing was going to be forgotten. Maybe Phil could finally get some sleep again.

 

But then as soon as it started, it stopped. A slam of a door broke Phil from his happiness. Dan had left the house. Phil sighed and looked down at his cereal. He wasn't so hungry anymore.

 

Dan didn't return until late that night. Phil had been waiting in the lounge. If they didn't talk than their problem would never be solved.

 

"Where have you been?" Phil asked as Dan walked up the stairs. Dan jumped a but. He clearly hadn't expected Phil to be waiting for him.

 

"I was out," Dan said simply "Why do you care?" Dan spat at Phil who instantly looked hurt. Dan knew he cared but he was hurting.

 

"Because you can ignore me and snap at me and say you hate me forever. You could put a spear through my heart and you know what would be the worst thing about it Dan. I would still use my last words to tell you how much I love you. I would still make sure I died knowing that I care. Because this is me. Whoops. Tell everyone how much of a mess Phil is for still being in love with someone who hates him because of a simple mistake I made. I did it Dan. I'm the one who let the video stay up. I'm the one who caused all of this-"

 

And they were kissing again. Desperation and desire. Dan's hands cupping Phil's cheeks, pulling him as close as physically possible. Phil didn't want them to break apart. Not after what had happened in the morning. He thought they were so close to forgiveness and then Dan ripped it away from him. This time would be different. This time... Phil wouldn't let go.

 

So with his arms wrapped firmly around Dan's waist, Phil pulled away from the kiss to breathe. He opened his eyes, expecting to see Dan looking angry again, fighting Phil to get away. Instead he saw the tears and the broken shell of a man. He saw the person who was pleading him to not let go.

 

It was going to be a journey that they took together but they would get there. And Phil wasn't going to let go.

 

And although years later, 2012 was a dark period not spoken about in the Phandom. Dan smiled remembering it. Yes it was horrible and yes he was cruel to Phil. But they made it through. And the years following were great. After every storm, the sun comes out eventually. Even if it seems like it won't.


End file.
